Two-Year Repost: A reflective hair journey: Have you been on one?

/Original Post, Personal Blog, 14th February 2017/

I went through the biggest heartbreak of my life. Even though I knew it was coming, it hurt nevertheless.

Looking back, I am sure there are many ways to recover from a passing relationship, but I think my choice of action was what I needed the most then. Some people are strong enough to do nothing and still come out stronger from hard life situations. I, on the other hand, had to chop off my hair and color it crazy.

Smart idea?

I SAY YES!

This is how I looked before my ‘colors’ hit me.

Simple. Long black hair. Nothing wrong with it, really. But in my head, it represented a dull and monotonous life. A life where I was going to be 30 soon and I must settle.

Something I never wanted for myself. Yet, I also didn’t have the balls to be anything better, cooler or fiercer.

Reflecting on it, I have always been in awe of people who stand up for who they are, especially women. Basically, anyone who doesn’t fit stereotypes is someone I most probably would be in awe of. My role models have never been people who follow societal BRULES (bullshit rules), yet at the same time, I always liked to watch them from far.

Going back to the point, one big dent in the heart gave me the biggest push to make life my own.

I mean I have colored my hair before. Always half-assing through it though. One purple streak when I was 18. A blue patch at 20. A little redder when I was 25.

It made me very happy (as you can see from that smile) yet what I did last year was what I like to call ‘jumping directly into the deep side’. Or what other people call ‘going bad-shit crazy!’

I guess you don’t need a bigger smile when your head is smiling through all that color, right?

That day was one of the most interesting days of my life.

My mum had a heart attack. Who will marry her now?

My father was happy to see few strands of black hair. Why can’t she meditate and get over a breakup like normal people?

People started to look at me differently. Either, they expected me to be really weird or really cool. “You work in the education and development sector?? NO WAY!”. “Can you get a job with this hair?”. “My mother would disown me if I did this, but I really want to!”

Haha!

So what changed?

I guess I no longer feel like the person who watches from far.

Since that day, I have felt this sudden boost of energy. Maybe I am trying to live up to my hair but my life has gotten more and more vibrant. I talk to strangers. I travel more. I ask more questions. I take even more selfies. I make random weird faces. I learn from my failures. I stand up for what I believe in. I eat healthily. I exercise. I work harder. I achieve more.

So much so, that two months back, I went for it again..

This time, my mother picked the colors and my grandmother approved :p

Okay, I may be losing the plot here a little. Why am I sharing this story with you? I don’t think I have a real answer but I am sitting here wondering, whoever thought that hair had so much power?

Or was it me just finally standing up for myself?

It took coloring my hair for me to start my journey of self-love and self-discovery. It has been helping me identify aspects of life I really care for and the ones that I don’t. I may not even color it again (also ‘cos I need to look for a job!) but here I stand looking back at this rainbow dream that I have been on.

I now know that I am more than what people want me to be and life can be turned in any direction I want to go.

The last direction took to me to Paris ❤

So, leaving you with a question:

I am eager to explore what other people do in such situations of feeling ‘stuck’. Do people lose the plot like me or stay more grounded? Reply as a comment..

Would you ever go on such a colourful hair journey? ;)

A special thank you to Avani from Happy in the Head for beautifully starting me on this path and being one of those people who I will always be in awe of! ❤